OOM: Business taken care of

[latino_menace]

He's well used to sitting at home and waiting for news on how business has gone. It's been that way for a long time. This is different though, because this is Random out there and getting his hands dirty and while he knows that the man is good, it's still a worry.

So he's sitting at the kitchen table with a bottle of Scotch and impatient fingers tapping on the tabletop. He knows Mal did her bit and is fine. But what of Random?

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[latino_menace]

And another kiss, because he does like it and talking like this reminds him of when he wasn't allowed to touch him for ages, and it was torture. And least he appreciates every time he's allowed to run his hands over him now. Hates it when he can't.

'Maybe. Still. Thanks for coming back. It would have been so much worse if...well, not the thing itself. I'd have killed myself. But afterwards - it wouldn't have been good if you weren't there waiting for me.'

[underwater-owl.livejournal.com]

"I was really, really afraid you were going to."

He confesses it with a small frown, and a duck of his head to Ramon's shoulder.

"That... I could have handled better. I tried to repress everything, so you wouldn't feel it, you know? And then after two months of that I snapped and freaked out and left. Pretty dumb."

[latino_menace]

'I wanted to.' It's not so hard to admit. If he hadn't promised Random he wouldn't, he would have.

His fingers tangle in Random's hair, as usual.

'Don't worry about it. Christ, you should never have been in that position in the first place. Should have just let me have it. I'd have deserved it for putting you through it.'

And he tries to make sure that Random never feels anything like it again. Doesn't always succeed, but tries.

[underwater-owl.livejournal.com]

"No, you didn't."

He closes his eyes, and stifles a yawn, fighting back a fatigue he didn't think he'd feel.

"That's the thing. You deserved my part of it. Arithon's part of it. But then everything else, and at once? And then that CTU bitch? And the time I joked about Naraht and you said to throw the rock in the lake and practically started crying for trying to make me laugh?"

Yes, he still remembers that moment.

"That, you didn't."

[latino_menace]

He remembers too, that now that Random's brought it up again. About the rock. That had been...weird. As for Michelle - well, he'll never forget that night. Some amounts of pain stay with you.

'Maybe. At the time, I thought I deserved it.' Which was part of it, of course. Now...he doesn't think about it, so really doesn't know.

'It doesn't matter. It's done now.'

He looks at him closly and traces a fingers briefly over his bottom lip.

'You're tired. Sleep.'

[underwater-owl.livejournal.com]

"You're beautiful. Kiss me goodnight?"

He smiles at him, eyes drifting closed.

"I'm glad. That we came through it. That I know even in your darkest moments, I can hold you. That you know that even when there's nothing else, there'll be me. I'm sorry you were hurt, but I'm glad I was there for you."

[latino_menace]

I'll always let you hold me. And always hold you. That's love, isn't it?

He kisses him, long and soft, deeper than usual for a goodnight kiss because they're together and he can.

'I'm glad you were there too. And if you ever need me like that - or for anything at all - I'll be there for you, alright? I love you.'

One last soft peck at his lips and then he settles back.

'Night baby.'

[underwater-owl.livejournal.com]

"I know."

And that, he thinks, is love.


"Night."

His eyes close for good.

[latino_menace]

He watches him quietly, for a long time. His mind is full of when he didn't have this, how close he was to losing it, how he could have been dead now if it weren't for Random.

Getting him was worth any amount of pain. He'd do it all again to keep him.

Only when his breathing is even and soft, does Ramon let himself close his eyes. Sometimes, it's nice to just watch and know you've got something that's never going away.