He could say to her that the reason he doesn't love her the way she loves him is because he loves Random the way she loves him. But that would be cruel, so he doesn't. He even stops himself twirling his wedding ring with his thumb the way he unconsciously finds himself doing at times likes this.

'If there were such thing as curses for sins, then you'd never have fallen for me.'

Because he's done far, far worse things than accidentally blow up a busload of kids. He's hurt them on purpose, and so many times he cant even count. And he doesn't feel bad about it.

'I don't know what you want me to say. I care about you enough that I'm not going to lie to you. I don't want to be without you. If you say you don't want my child, I won't be able to forget it but I'm not going to drop you because of it. I can't promise to love you because I don't know what that means.'

And it's the first time in a long time he's admitted that. He couldn't put it into words very well then, either. So he takes a breath and looks away, collecting his thoughts before looking back.

'I thought love was supposed to be wanting to be with someone and missing them when they're not around. About planning to have a life with them. Having fun together. Great sex. Being able to have conversations like this. By that rationale...then yes, you have what you want.'

She gave him the god's honest truth, so he'll repay the favour.

'But I'm not going to drop down dead if you're not around. My heart won't stop beating; I'm not going to kill myself or cry into my tequila for the next twenty years.'

It's need he's talking about. He needs Random, like air. And to him, that's love. Anything else just pales against it.